Since July, I have been doing the nightime things with Niko; that inlcudes pooping and peeing in the big toilet, bathing him, getting him dressed in his pajamas, feeding him snacks with milk and water, reading him books, reading him more books, brushing his teeth, singing to him, and finally, almost 75 minutes later, putting him down for sleep in the crib. This is by far the best part of my day and I enjoy our time together.
We laugh and talk alot and of course, I get the occasional screaming hysterical fit because something happened that he didn’t want to happen. Like, taking his pajamas off while he was sitting on the toilet because he had them on all day, not sitting in a chair after we just sat in the chair for 30 minutes, not singing him the correct song or singing the incorrect words, not putting every single blanket on him in the crib; well, you get the point.
He gets mad at things that he wants to control and most of the time, he tells me why he is mad. A few weeks ago, Nina and I were 30 seconds from freedom; I mean, Niko was in his crib with his 3 blankets on him and we were saying goodnight and walking out the door. Instead of saying goodnight and I love you, he said, I have to poop! Now, when he says that, I have to honor it and let him go, even though I tell him he has a diaper on and no matter what time it is or how stinky it is, I will change it. All he has to do is scream for me and I will do my job. And, yes, I will hear him as his room his less than 50 steps from ours and I have a camera with audio on my nighttable. Sometimes, I hear him in the middle of the night say momma; I look at the camera to make sure he is OK and he fast asleep.
To make a long story short, I took him to the toilet for a poop, which he did, but it took almost 90 more minutes to get him back in the crib. He was crying a lot because he was tired; it was way past his bedtime. We went thru a lot of tissues that night and got extra water, singing, and cuddling in. For me, it was one of the hardest nights I have had with him in a long time.
For the past several weeks, Nina has been coming up and has been helping me brush his teeth and putting him in the crib for sleeping. We have a song called Nikolai that we made up and Nina and I each have different versions! And, he knows the difference. Right before he goes in the crib, he wants kisses in his hands from both of us and he proceeds to give me 3 kisses on my mouth, but it always turns into a lot more. I am special because he doesn’t do that with mom. Then, when all the hand and mouth kisses are finished, he says kiss in the crib; I put him in and give him a kiss and then Nina gives him a kiss.
We usually sit him up on his chaging pad on top of the dresser when we brush his teeth and for the past few weeks, Niko gives me a great big hug and says I missed you, I haven’t seen you all day! Oh, that makes me feel like I am doing a good job on being a father.
Niko is at that age where he wants to do things himself and most of the time, I let him do it. I don’t bother him when he is on the toilet in the evenings and I give him a few flushable wipes to use when he is done; yes, he wipes his own butt and does a really good job. He flushes, gets off the toilet, and walks naked into the bathtub! When the bathtub is nearing completion, he helps put all the toys away for the next night. He is so good on the toilet and in the bathtub that I can do other things in the bathroom for myself; most notably shaving.
Sometimes, I will get in the tub with Niko and after I finish shampooing him, he proceeds to shampoo me. Man, just seeing his smile and hearing his laughs makes my day and on the plus side, I get to be cleaned.
Right now, Dr. Suess books; One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish and Hunches in Bunches are Niko’s prime choices for me to read to him in the evening as I always let him choose. He even reads a little bit to me, but I think that is more of his memory than actual reading. He knows when I skip a page or say a different word and he follows the words with his eyes. I am slowly teaching about ryhming words as Dr. Suess is all about that.
For me, I enjoy reading to him and it doesn’t matter what book it is. I do have a voice disorder called Abductor Spasmodic Dysphonia. Basically, my vocal cords have involuntary muscle spasms which I can’t control and I have difficulty with certain letters. I was diagnosed in 2006 and did a year of speech thereapy and have had many Botox injections since then. I am actually doing really good and most of the time, you won’t even notice my voice. Some people with this same disorder are much worse than me. I do notice it sometimes when I read, but I just stop and start over and do it slowly.
